..Wasting Time..

Yesterday, I had two hours set aside to go into the student union before class to study for my World Civilization exam. I ended up having to spend one of those hours tryinig to print an outline for a whole other class. so I had one hour to fill out a study guide for the biggest exam I have this semester. I spent the duration of my writing class studying, so that was helpful. and the quiz went well.

But then, last night, I sat in my bed with my computer (which is not a routine), because i wanted to start watching modern family. i had heard wonderful things about it, and it was the perfect time. I figured to best place to start would be the pilot. then i spent an hour surfing the net to try to find the pilot. it was nowhere. two hours of my day wasted.

How disappointing when something that should have taken five minutes takes an hour. How dissappointing when that hour could have been spent doing something productive or enjoyable. sometimes, "wasted" is a word overused, but not here. Those two hours were wasted. perhaps I learned patience or that I should give up after fifteen minutes instead of an hour, but it was wasted.

Jay-Walking

Yes, about bib herm again. sorry.

my prof said, "if we were to go out and ask people on the street, jay leno style."

an effort to be hip and relevant.

i love jay leno, but i almost took a vow never to watch his show again.

we've got to save ginny weasley from the basilisk!

i've just discovered a band called harry and the potters. they are the greatest ever. they make me smile. please listen to them.

you know you haven't had enough sleep when... you run your hand against the wall to keep from falling, then when you take it away, your arm tingles

True story. my nerve endings are going bonkers.

Yesterday was the last performance of Tuck Everlasting at school. It went well. It is good to be done. Auditions for Proof, the next show, are tommorrow. Yesterday evening, we had a group reading session. It was actuallly reallly cool because all of us who are sortof competing against eachother were reading, sharing ideas, helping eachother out. It was really nice.

It was exhausting. Reading for so many different characters... (ok there were 2, but they're radically different, and it's an emotionally charged play.) was exhilerating, but it takes something out of you. It takes alot of things out of you!

After reading, some friends went to Arby's. Jamocha. Shake. Yum.

When we got back to the dorm around 11, it was coffee time. homework time. I'm usually really good about not doing homework at night and just getting work done during the day so i don't have to worry about it after 5/6. But with Tuck, everything kindof got put on the back-burner. So, heremeneutics, White Christmas work, Terra Firma, plus getting constantly distracted by Paige and Lydia's conversation about acting. Ok, it was Paige, Lydia and Audrey's conversation. It wasn't a distraction, it was a backstreet. or the highway.

So now i've made myself another pot of coffee. I got up to go to chapel, actually, but i have not been told where today's chapel is -- it's a smaller, broken-up chapel today. and now i'm blogging.

Three classes for today. Then, research for my writing assignment, more White Christmas, then White Christmas rehearsal. And more Proof. Paige and Lydia wanted to give it a day off. I will not.

I plan to do everything that I need to between the end of class -- 4 -- and White Christmas -- 7 -- so that after White Christmas -- 10 -- I can crash.

NOT biblical hermeneutics!

I might just start another blog just about bib herm because i have so many complaints!! so i've decided to dedicate this blog post specifically to topics other than biblical hermeneutics considering that the past ... many posts have been on that loathsome topic.

I wrote a paper called "Social Justice and Consumerism." the thesis was that non-profits feed off of American consumerism, which only deepens the problem. by manipulating it and stroking it, it becomes more engrained into our heads AND into our hearts. by making us believe that our money is the end-all, we want to spend more! and the product that they are selling is not someone else's health or meal or clothes or cow. it's your own sense of self-satisfaction.

I am a victim. I would give all my money to non-profits if someone didn't stop me. i think that some of the work of non-profits is fantastic, and it changes and saves lives. many even change the courses of spiritual lives, which is even better.

my college will be putting on a play called PROOF. it's marvelous. it's about a girl, Catherine who has helped care for her infirm father for years instead of going to school or having relationships or anything. her sister, Claire finished school and helped pay off bills on the house since their father needed someone with him at all times, so Catherine couldn't get a job. i'd like to share an excerpt:

Claire: It was my house too.
Catherine: You haven't lived here for years.
CL: I know that. You were on your own. I really regret that, Katie.
CA: Don't.
CL: I know i let you down. I fell awful about it. Now i'm trying to help.
CA: You want to help now?
CL: yes.
CA: Dad is dead.
CL: I know.
CA: He's dead. How that he's dead you fly in for the weekend and decide you want to help? YOU'RE LATE. Where have you been?
CL: I --
CA: Where were you five years ago? You weren't helping then.
CL: I was working.
CA: I was HERE. I lived with him ALONE.
CL: I was working fourteen-hour days. I paid every bill here. I paid off the mortgage on this three-bedroom house while I was living in a studio in Brooklyn.
CA: You had your life. You got to finish school.
CL: You could have stayed in school!
CA: How?
CL I would have done anything -- i told you that. I told you a million times to do anything you wanted.
CA: What about Dad? SOmeone had to take care of him.
CL: He was ill. He should have been in a full-time professional care situation.
CA: He didn't belong in the nuthouse.

It's an issue of individual vs. community. probably my favorite discussion. when the individual is placed first, it almost always places money on a pedestal over human life and value. when rights are claimed verses received, money is more powerful than compassion.I don't know what i would have done. I love school. what if one of my parents died, and the other went crazy? i realized it's a unique situation, but think about it. what would you do? pay to have them well cared for? they would be well cared for, but is that what we OUGHT to do? or should we take care of them ourselves? yes, i'm only 18. taking care of a mentally unstable parent, and in my case two little brothers who would be seriously emotionally damaged, and having to cope with my own emotions as well. If i went to care for them, and my older sister stayed in school and funneled us money, what would i think? i would not be ungrateful for the money. i would not be able to work. but what is right? what is good? is one better than the other? are both necessary? just some thoughts.

Do, a Deer

Do, the stuff they put in twinkies
Re, the guy who buys me twinkies
Me, the guy ray buys them for
Fa, a long, long way to the twinkie store!
So, i think i'll have a twinkie
La, la la la la la TWINKIE!
Ti, um, no thanks. i'd rather have a twinkie
that will bring us back to DO!

"It's not about singing. It's about twinkies."
-Emily Steadman

Ego-booster

I think my bib-herm adjuct professor uses our class to make him feel better about himself. He does all the same work as us, which is cool that he's working with us, excpet he just says things that are self-glorifying. he hands out his work for us to look at, which theoretically could be helpful, but he pointed out, "i have 44 observations, and that's not even exhaustive. Although I was exhausted by the end of it." and then, he chuckled at his own little joke.

when someone teaches, it ought to be directed at the student and towards their learning. not about impressing anyone with knowledge. when someone has the courage to stick their hand up and their neck out to answer a question to try to contribute to a discussion in class, and especially if their answer is close, their answer ought not be shut down. it is dehumanizing to be told, "not exactly. what i would say...." it turns us students into weak, incabable sponges that have not way to output, but only to soak in the prof's wisdom.

that's all.